Take your time with love and enjoy the fall

It’s an inner charge more exhilarating than Formula One and NASCAR racing. It’s a high-speed thrill ride in which you’re liable to crash, breaking someone’s heart including your own.

Falling in love is exhilarating; falling in love is also a vulnerable state of being. It’s a free-will choice and when we fall in love, we tend to move toward one another at a high rate of speed, gaining momentum as we move into one another’s lanes.

We attribute the speed to the wonders of finding that unique bond, partner, and partnership, but we can be blinded by love and without notice, the acceleration comes quick and love has a grip on us. Love is unconditional and nurturing on every level. I’ve found five factors, which if survived, could give love a shot at longevity.

The Charge: Love, compassion, thoughtfulness, attentiveness and the sweet rushes you get through thoughtful, kind, and generous gestures. This creates a charge within like no other thing in life, and really gets your juices flowing. You crave this daily, and break into a smile just at the thought of your love interest. Everything is new and an amazing; an electric rush flows through your veins.

The Contingency: If the attraction is mutual, then also is the risk of rejection for a number of reasons. Both people will become sensitive to any sign of withdrawal or, the fulfillment of expected conditions become uncertain. Lack of communication, defensive actions, decreased sexual performance and expecting too much can become an issue.

The Cogwheel: Any rush-generating gesture will come to be expected to continue, any egression can be taken as a potential sign of withdrawal and create insecurity. If you always called before going to sleep, then not calling for a period of time might be taken as a sign that you’re withdrawing. It is hard to lower expectations once one has become accustomed to certain actions from another and those actions just stop. When the wheel stops rolling, things seem to come to a halt and create an uneasiness.

The Climb: With every kind gesture, another kind gesture can be or will be expected. To stop will only engender the delight you need to heat-up and heighten the pleasure with ever more generous gestures.

The Calm: You can’t keep adding generous gestures at an accelerating rate forever. At some point, they will taper off and practicality will set in, and in order to survive this and continue a happy partnership, you have to give the climb a rest, establish decelerating gestures, and be more realistic in your future together and how you will grow forward. Successful couples understand deceleration and practicality, as they get months or years into their relationship. They become practical and come to take each other and the rarity of fresh new generous gestures for granted.

We all have the ability to master the process of being loving … just as we have the power to design, create and govern over our own lives. Love is free, natural, and inherent to our nature, it’s our natural existence. It is healing and nurturing on every level …and contrary to what people think, it cannot be bought, sold, or mistaken for anything else!

It feels good to be able to allow what is and always has been to flow fluently, openly, and honestly.
Here are 10 things I know help with long-lasting love and assist in a healthier you and healthier relationship:

1) Speak lovingly
2) Listen intently and take action
3) Forgive without punishing
4) Share, openly and honestly
5) Keep your promises
6) Make your partner a priority
7) Honor your partners thoughts and feelings
Hugs and kisses
9) Sex and seduction
10) Give your partner some space.

With that said, love is always growing. And like every growing thing, you need to nurture it. Keep on nurturing the love; keep on sharing the love.